Got A Headache

I went to my friend this afternoon to pick some things. When I got home, I feel so nauseated and tired accompanied by terrible headache. I drunk a lot of water which I normally does with this hot weather. Then lie down in bed. Finally, I feel better after half an hour rest. 

How are headaches classified? 

Headaches have numerous causes, and in 2007 the International Headache Society agreed upon an updated classification system for headache. Because so many people suffer from headaches and because treatment sometimes is difficult, it is hope that the new classification system will allow health care practitioners come to a specific diagnosis as to the type of headache and to provide better and more effective treatment.

There are three major categories of headaches:

1. Primary headaches - includes migraine, tension and cluster headaches, as well as a variety of other less common type of headaches. Tension headaches occurs commonly to women than men and this is the common type of primary headaches. Migrane are the second common type of primary headaches and it's affect children as well as adults. Then cluster headaches are a rare type of primary headaches. It is commonly affects men in their late 20's. 

Primary headaches can affect the quality of life. Some people have occasional headaches that resolve quickly while others are debilitated. While these headaches are not life threatening, they may be associated with symptoms that can me mimic strokes or intracerebral bleeding.

    2. Secondary headaches - these headaches are those that are due to an underlying structural problem in the head or neck. There are numerous causes of this type of headache ranging from bleeding in the brain, tumor, or meningitis and encephalitis.

    3. Cranial neuralgias, facial pains, and other headaches. - Neuralgia means nerve pains. Cranial neuralgia describes a group of headaches that occur because the nerves in the head and upper neck become inflamed and become the source of the pain in the head. Facial pain and a variety of other causes for headache are included in this category.

Most people successfully treat themselves with over-the-counter pain medication. But beware also of those medications. It might have potential interactions specially if your taking special medications. Massage and rest can be helpful and if it worsen. It is wise to ask your health care practitioner. Just to be safe.

Sunday Stealing : 28 Question Meme

Hello everyone Happy New Month and Happy Sunday to All.

Today Sunday Stealing is 28 Question Meme! Join me to this meme!

Cheers to all us thieves!

1. Was your dad named after anyone?

- I don't think so.

2. What do you think is the minimal age to get married?

- 25 years old

3. What’s the longest time that you‘ve been involved with the same person?

- 3 years

4. What actor/actress do you consider hot at the moment?

- Angelina Jolie

5. What is you favorite album by a band?

-Hillsong

6. What is your favorite album by an individual artist?

-

7. What is something that you‘d rather be a bit dirty?

-

8. What was the last TV show that you watched?

-Oprah Winfrey Show

9. How many people have you met from the blogosphere? Who are they?

- Met in person? None of them, but I talk a few at instant messenger

10. What's your philosophy on life?

-To love and be love and return

11. Do you think prescription drugs are over prescribed?

- Maybe

12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?

- Yes

13. What is your favorite memory in the last year?

- A lovely holiday vacation to the Dead Sea together with my cousin

14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?

-Eating chocolates

15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:

- Want to have sperm cell insemination, lol

16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they?

- Happy family, good health, and travel around the world.

17. Who would you want to get together with and make a cake?

- My boyfriend

18. Which country is your spiritual home?

- Philippines

19. What is your big weakness?

-My family , specifically may parents!

20. Do you think Judd Corizan is a good person?

- I don't know her

21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?

-Science and history

22. Describe your accent:

-English accent, average.lol

23. If you could change anything about yourself, would you?

-Being too kind , because people will take advantage of me. I want to change that. hahaha

24. What do you wear to sleep?

-short and sleeveless

25. What is your favorite casual outfit to wear?

- Jeans and T-shirst

26. Do you use cigarettes or alcohol?

-Alocohol -rarely, Cigarettes - Never

27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy, it'll entertain me!)

-Climb the mountain , mesmerizing the happy memories

28. Rate the memes that you play generally. Use any scale or just in order.  

-  Ten

On What I've Been Doing Lately

Hey, guys, I'm back here. Happy Sunday to all and hope you enjoy your weekend ^-^

I missed these things, writing about myself, what I've been thinking or doing? Lately, I'm too lazy to do certain things. I enjoyed looking back those time when I was a little kid and happy to be with my siblings.  It procrastinating my time until ends up in one pack because I have to do it quickly. In short unproductive and tiring days.

Going back those memories on my mind (it's always been a part of me)for the past few days that wasted my time. Modestly speaking, I've always been a good girl. For almost 19 years away without parental guidance, I have no choice but to be strong and to stand my own. From a country girl who never knew what city life is. But never, never came up to my mind to do things that can never be proud of especially to my family and to my self. However, there are times that on my journey towards my goal, there are people tries to break it. They stole the trust of my family and the people who cared and loved me. Partly they've won to destroy me  but I'm still lucky eventually at the end I got back the trust they've been given me.  It made me cry  I cannot forgive those people, I tried too but the hate and the anger stayed here in my heart. Somehow, someday, time can heal the wound.

It made me surprised also that for 11 years that I've only  seen  my family once in a year for five days and now eight straight years without seeing them hit me to missed my mother so much. I know it's normal but I find it odd feelings, it's not like me,  being away for many years I can't even remember the cooking of my mother. But then,  I still remember her voice shouting at me. LOL! I can still remember the way she get angry with my father. I can't remember her touch but I can remember her smile. Certainly, mother has unconditional love and I know she missed me that much as I missed her too. I have spoken to her yesterday and that missed her a lot more. My relationship with my mother is not like what my siblings have, that probably had been missing between us. But I admire my mother so tenderly.

It made me think also that I wish people came with warning labels so I know which one to avoid. I know I'm not perfect, I have flaws also as a human being. A human being  who is tired to those self-centered, selfish, thoughtless and careless people. People who waste so much of my time and energy. The most disapointing part is you get a long these people so well but also can get hard to handle every day. It's quiet the double edge sword for there is nothing like a genuine human caring response yet nothing as crushing or disappointing as cruel, thoughtless, insensitive response.

Those thoughts occupied my mind lately and I forgot the things I have to do..Such as

1. I have to pick up my box to my friend so that I could start packing now with my second box to be send home this end of the month.
2. I have to cut toenails of Sara. I forgot it for quiet a few days already

3. I have some ironing to do

And lastly, yesterday I had a big job and shouldn't be neglected even for a second. Hehehe! When we came home from the pool , water was flowing in the floor of the kitchen. Gee! Our freeze, suddenly turn off , the machine is not working.. Whew! So, I cleaned up  and it lasted me two hours to finish. I cleaned the whole kitchen though hahaha!

Happy Sunday!

On Wednesday Wickedness

My first Entry for Wednesday Wickedness:

Hi and welcome to Wednesday Wickedness. We are like other memes in that we will ask you ten questions each and every Wednesday. But our little "twist" is that each week we will pick a famous person and pick ten of their quotes. Each of our questions will be based on the quotes. Got it? Great! Let's begin this week's meme!

Today we picked Ellen Degeneres. Here's Wednesday Wickedness!

1. "I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves." How old were you when you started working and what was your first job?

- I started working at age thirteen - handling deliveries and purchases of frozen and canned goods.

2. "My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is." Tell us about your grandparents.

- I was seven years old when my  paternal grandmother died. As far I remember she was a very kind woman. She worked like a midwife but not license midwife. She only used to help pregnant woman deliver their babies at home.  I never see my grandfather neither my maternal grandparents.

3. "Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off." Do you procrastinate or are you on top of the situations?

- Yes , sometimes during my off day , I used to do things in a last minute..lol but eventually it turned out so well.

4. "Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others." What would others say about you?

- I'm not a friendly type of person but others see me as charming, kind , helpful and sometimes my boyfriend told me I'm dominant and rational.. lol!

5. "The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens. We can't be the best that creation has to offer. I pray we're not all there is. If so, we're in big trouble" Do you believe in life on other planets?

- Growing up in a farm land I've heard a lot of stories about these but I haven't seen any. so, I don't think so though it made me goose pimples listening the stories

6. "I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that." Do you have a godchild?

- Yes, I do have. Daughter and son of my best friend

7. "I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. It must stand for: 'Ohhh my God, you're thin.'" When was the last time that you were called too thin?

- Since I was a kid until 14 years old I always called skinny with my friends and family and those people who see me

8. "I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe you don't remember me!" I'm like, 'Oh Dad I'm sorry!'" Who was the last person that you should have recognized but didn't?

- I'm very good in remembering names and faces. So, I can't remember who was the last person that I know but I cannot recognize.

9. "I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been about two months since I've worked out. And I just don't have the time. Which uh..is odd. Because I have the time to go out to dinner. And uh..and watch tv. And get a bone density test. And uh.. try to figure out what my phone number spells in words." Do you work out? Have you ever joined a gym and quit almost immediately?

- Thanks for reminding me.. Hahaha! I should work out. Walking and jogging by the beach. I never been to gym.

10. 'We use 10 percent of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60 percent." Do you feel that you utilize all your intelligence in every situation?

- My  boyfriend use to tell me that I'm clever to reason out ..lol! I could easily find ways to reason out..And Sara said (my patient) telling me often  that I always have an answer in every question.. But I don't think so that I utilize all my intelligence in every situation. I'm not in a corporate or politics world for that..Hahahaha!

Thank you Wednesday Wickedness, I became crazy a little bit answering these questions..Hahaha!

 

Meme of Many Odd Questions - Part 1 & 2

Join me here to answer these meme of many odd questions. 



Cheers to all of us thieves!  

Part 1 

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
- My hair

 2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
- Exemption, I don't have a hoodie

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
- No

4. Do you plan outfits?
- Yes, sometimes

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
- Just fine

6. What's the closest thing to you that's red?
-My phone

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having?
- I'm not usually having dreams, so, I cannot honestly remember
8. Did you meet anybody new today?
- NO

9. What are you craving right now?
- Filipino Food

10. Do you floss?
-Yes, of course

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
-Vegetable

12. Are you emotional?
-Yes, I am

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
-From 1 to 1,000. I think not.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
- I lick ice cream

15. Do you like your hair?
-My curly hair ?No.

16. Do you like yourself?
- Yes, I love myself

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
- Yes, if given an opportunity, why not?

18. What are you listening to right now?
- Symphony Orchestra.. My lady is listening this music now

19. Are your parents strict?
- Hmmm, slight lol!

20. Would you go sky diving?
- I love to try

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
- Yes

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
- Filipino celebrities , yes!

Part 2

23. Do you rent movies often?
-No, I watch movie in my laptop

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
-No, I'm alone in my room. lol

25. How many countries have you visited?
- None but I'm a Filipino working in Israel

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
-Yes, but very rarely

27. Ever been on a train?
- Yes

28. Brown or white eggs?
- White Eggs

29. Do you have a cell-phone?
- Yes

30. Do you use Chap Stick?
-No idea what is chap stick

31. Do you own a gun?
- NO

32. Can you use chop sticks?
-Yes, I can

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
-Work, old lady patient. lol

34. Are you too forgiving?
-Yes, but it takes time.

35. Ever been in love?
- Yes

36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow (or the next soonest week day)?
- Probably back to work

37. Ever have cream puffs?
-What is cream puffs?lol

38. Last time you cried?
- Last night

39. What was the last question you asked?
- Why you don't want to go to the doctor?

40. Favorite time of the year?
- Winter and Spring time

41. Do you have any tattoos?
- No

42. Are you sarcastic?
- Sometimes, I could be sarcastic

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
- Yes

44. Ever walked into a wall?
- Yes

On my Three's

I've been tag this my three's from Hahpiness of Happy Thoughts. So , giving you a chance to know me more. Here are my three's.

3 Names I go by

Issa

Thata

Issang

3 Place I have been 

Jerusalem

Dead Sea

Mt. Hermon

 Floating - Dead Sea Water

3 Favorite Drinks

Lemonade

Orange Juice

Shake/Latte

3 Jobs I have had 

Government Contractual Employee

Accounting Assistant

Bank Employee , yes in a short time

3 TV Shows I Watch

Oprah

American Idol 

Dr. Phil

3 Places I would Like to Visit

Italy

Australia

Hongkong

3 Fave Retro TV Show 

Gimik

ASAP

Mara Clara

3 Favorite Dishes

 Tempura

Bihon Guisado

Beef Stew

3 Things I'm Looking Forward To

Going home to see my family again in  8 years

My Big Day

Adventure/Vacation

Huh, I can't believe I had difficulty answering some of  these. LOL. The three places I've been, (I've never been places except Israel and Hongkong Airport.LOL!) The retro TV Shows - I have no idea, til'  I sneak out the answer of hahpiness then I realized those 3 are my fave when I was in High School. ^-^

Thanks for tagging me sis Hahp!

Now, I tag these to three people :

Vernz of Woman's Elan Vital

Anygen of Home Decors and Gifts

Dhemz of My Life Perception and Inspiration

Enjoy!

GT-What's Inside my Bag

Featuring Girls Talk Theme this week - What's inside my Bag? I recently used this bag on my Baha'i Garden adventure last Sunday.

My cute small Kipling shoulder bag with 4 compartments inside

What's Inside 

Lipstick

My Passport

Tissue

My Red Wallet

Keys

Hand Cream

Ballpen

Plaster

Pressed Powder

Sony Digital Camera

Nurofen for Headache in case of emergency

Sticker Notes

A Memory of War

Do you remember the time of Peoples Power Revolution? A mass street prayerful demonstrations that occurred in 1986? This Nostalgia shared to you happened a month before the Peoples Power Revolution know as the Edsa Revolution of today.

Yes, I certainly remembered those times because it was the time that our village was covered by military and NPA's (New Peoples Army) was hiding in the land of inhabitants people. They even put landmines and villagers were afraid. 

I was 7 years old and was playing in our garden with my sisters and brothers  when landmines cracked near our village and then we heard a series of explosion. We ran into the house and started crying and looking for our father where he is. When father arrived the series of blast never stop. We thank GOD at those time he was already home .Then we were called by our father to go under our house where he made a shelter (well) that we can able to hide. But my grandmother who was a bedridden was left upstairs and keep shouting for help. 

As I remember it was a 3 hours blast, with a tank of war and helicopters, military that shouting. Houses was burned and some villagers was dead. We were very fortunate that the tank of war fell off facing to the sea otherwise all the houses and the people including as is dead. After the war, scout ranger visiting from one house to another. Asking if we hide rebels at home. Innocent men was tortured and abused by military because they thought they were members of NPA. When they came to our house, they asked my mother if she want to die? My mother answered "NO, Sir, I still got small children" Lucky they didn't tortured my father. 

A day after the war, we were warned to move out because it might be injurious. So, we went to our neighboring village far from the explosion but after 3 days we came back. It was quiet then , and we tried to live into a normal life without fear, but Grand Mother still shocked, she never eat, never drink, and after 10 days she died.

Since then, we grew up with the fear of gunfire, stranger people and military. But we were grateful that despite the events he gave us life and a chance to live and see the beauty of the world. 

Now, if we discuss the events there, we laugh because were hiding in a well and we felt sad when we remember  the experience of a child behind a pole crying because her grandparents was shoot and the house was burned. I can't really imagine how she cope such terrifying incidents of her life. We were not friends but I heard she in America now and live a happy life with her friends and family. 

For more Nostalgic Stories, click the button above

Water is Beauty

Do you love drinking water? If not, then, start and make as a habit to drink 8 glasses of water everyday. Drinking a lot of water each and everyday helps to keep your beauty from fading. That's the secret.

 

 Honestly, I personally find it difficult to drink 8 glasses of water throughout the day. I can prove that since I've made an effort to drink several glasses of water each day , it does not only helps me to feel better but it has improved the appearance of my skin. I feel and look much healthier. So now I'm a firm believer that water is beauty and do go hand in hand.   

 

 

Sorry

GT-Vanity Kit

Girl Talk Time.. Hmmm, Am I vain? Certainly, I am a girl. So judge me after you've seen what inside my vanity kit..

My Vanity Kit, What's inside???

Careline Corrective Foundation, Jade Blush on, No7 Lipstick, Jade Eye Shadows, Avon Pressed Powder, Eye Curler, Water Proof Deep Eye Liner, No7 Eye Pencil, No7 Protect Hand Cream, No7 Mascara, No7 Eye Cream, No7 Beauty Serum Cream, Sharpener, Compete Set of Brushes and Make up Remover.

I usually take this kit when I'm out for a day with lipstick, eye pencil, pressed powder and and a brown and blue eye brows. Opps, I didn't include my No7 perfume.. 

What can you say? Obviously I love make ups! I've learned it here. From a young innocent girl when I was in the Philippine to a grown naive lady...LOL! I'll allow you to say anything girls...! What inside your vanity kit too?

A strong woman vs A woman of strength

I was tagged this note from facebook and I thought I would like to share! I found it interesting.

A strong woman works out everyday to keep her body in shape?But a woman of strength builds relationships to keep her soul in shape

A strong woman isn't afraid of anything?But a woman of strength shows courage in the midst of fear.

A strong woman won't let anyone get the better of her? But a woman of strength gives the best of herself to everyone.

A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future?A woman of strength realize  life's mistakes can also be unexpected blessings, and capabilities on them

A strong woman wears a look of confidence on her face? But a woman of strength wears grace.

A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey? But a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong.

I do believe that I am a strong woman and have strength to do anything. What about you? Are you a strong woman or a woman of strength?

What about Fashion Meme?

Absolutely obsess, loving myself. Hehehe! Because I have nothing to say at the moment or nothing to talk about. I came across to this fun fashion question and I thought I would love to forward to you beauty blogger.

1. What signature bag, you crave to have? 

Whew! I crave to have an Original Louis Vitton Bag. 

2. What beauty products you used? 

Hmmm, A lot.. When I was in the Philippines I usually used AVON or Sara Lee Products.. Here in Israel, I think No7 or dead sea. That's the brand product I got in my dresser.

3. What brand of lingerie you used now?

Time to reveal .. Triumph and Avon  bra and some nickers..But for everday, I used cheap one nickers.LOL!

4. What things you can't go out without ?

Geeee, my phone I can't go out with out it.

5. What clothing you usually wear except jeans and t-shirt? 

I love to wear mini skirt .and shorts.. But I'm not blessed with lovely legs!

6. What is your 3 favorite color for clothes? 

Black, Blue and Pink

7.What good, valuable clothing brand you recommend? 

Mango brand for tops , I love their styles and not so expensive here. Lee Copper for Jeans

8. What accessories you wear everyday, and what you crave to have? 

Watch and Earings.. and crave to have a pair of diamond earings. 

9. What is your favorite outfit for the season? 

For winter , --knee high clothes, leather boots either low or high heels.

For Summer -- fashionable dress or shorts , flip-flops or wedges.

10. Are you a good bargain shopper?

No, I'm not that's an honest answer.

I tag this to Jennie,  Cacai, Anne, Dhemz, Kaycee, Kurdapya,

If you can add more question that would be fun and exciting. You are welcome to add and you can tag me back ..

Happy Tagging!

On feeling sorry

Hey guys, sorry for my absence . I realized that I focused too much on blogging. I definitely, enjoyed reading your blogs contents,  BC-Bloggers journals and articles. Even I'm at work I tried to open  my computer and check
the latest updates with your topic.  Thus,  I became addicted on it and I realized that I still got an important job to do. In fact, as a caregiver, I have a big obligation and responsibility that shouldn't be neglected.

I just felt sorry that I cannot update my blogs from time to time and I tried my best to visit you guys too.

2C78YGAUTARB

on clumsy day

Hey beauties, I missed my post here yesterday , I was a bit busy and I try to sneak around while I'm working but I just didn't have time in here. I was too sleepy last night too.  I hope that everyone has a wonderful day though. Did you guys anything exciting?

At this point, Sarah and I went to supermarket yesterday to do some shopping. When we entered , we went straight to fruits area. When I picked up a box of plums to show it to her, the box was fell out from my hand and scattered on the floor. I was really embarrassed and instead of picking it, we left the area and pretended nothing happen. We kept on shopping and I stumbled to different kinds of nuts. I took a little bag and weigh little amount of wall nuts but the whole basket of wall nuts fell in front me. I was shocked. And one lady told me, "It's alright" and Sarah said "what happen to you" Yeah , I don't even know what happen to me. I'm not usually clumsy.

What about you guys? How do you feel if you have such experience? That was my exciting day..LOL!

on my good hair days

Hello , hello I know what you're all thinking, am I right? well, calm down with narcissism already. I just want to post some photos of me, behind my straight hair. hehehe!I am absolutely sure, I'm not the one who wanted to grab a camera immediately when experiencing a good hair day..

Anyway, I'm not posting a photo because I have a new hair or so but I'm posting because I'm revealing about something that has fundamentally change my life, or I should say the life of my hair lol.!

First of all, I have a curly hair and  like every woman, who are complicated. Admit it or not we are complicated, (smile). I like some changes with my hair. From curly hair to a straight hair. And to tell you the truth,  I'm not happy with my curly hair. When I was in the Philippines, I used to go to the salon for hair straightening. But when I came here it was all gone. Thinking the conversion of money , I found it very expensive.(thrift aside)

However, with the help of blow dry and a hair flat iron I can do what I want for my hair. I can make my own style without any hassle at all. If I want to go out , I don't need to go to the salon and pay for almost 15$ just to straight it temporarily. They used only blow drier to straighten my hair. To save up some money, I bought a small-ish flat iron. Quiet expensive but its very useful and I can have it for a lifetime as long I know how to take care and to use it.

Whew! I love it, I can't be as pretty as these without my flat-iron. Hurray! Modesty aside, I felt so good when I pampered myself like these.

on the things I miss

I miss waking up in the morning, busy preparing for my breakfast and for my lunch box for work. Wearing my work uniform like an executive, the smell of my wet hair from shower, the drawer that all my bit and pieces was there, the Winnie d pooh bed cover and pillows that I was comfortably hugging it and nobody can use that pillow because that was belong to me.

I miss the fresh air from the country where I grew up, the bayanihan with all the people know you and treated you that you're important , the fiestas that we could eat from one house to another LOL! , the Flores de Mayo, where the kids loves to attend. Preparing little basket of flowers and at the end a coronation who became a May flower of the night.

I miss the coffee of my mother LOL. Coffee out from corn rice and pure coffee, the SUMAN from my Aunt and the BIKO of my mother. The GINATAAN of my father, that he loves most whenever he made dinner for us. Waking up in the middle of the night to savour a fresh soup from sea foods ( crabs, shrimps, lobsters etc)when my father got home from fishing. The picnic in the middle of a coconut farm of my father.

I miss the familiar things. The things I knew that would always be there in my heart and my mind. In a typical child way, I guess, I never imagined things would ever be any different than they were. The daily laughter with my brothers and sisters, my childhood memories in the garden running and playing around with friends, the whistle of my father and what and how the way he disciplined us. A little presents from our parents when we A in school. A hug, a cry , a little soft voice when my mom talking with my father at night. The feeling that I am safe and comfortable.

These are the things that make me it hard to ever really grow up.

I love my childhood memories, with no worries,no problems. Although, I've learned a lot in life and I am proud of who I became now however there is still part of me feels like little girl. Maybe because I miss back home.

Am I truly brave?

While working this morning, It came across my mind what Erwin (my fiancee) told me when we have arguments. That, I am so brave. I smiled and asked myself if I am truly brave? then I gave a big laugh for myself of what I was thinking.

So, I listed few things that I would do if I am truly brave.

1. Write my life story and send it to "Maalaala Mo Kaya"

2. Sing in front of the big crowd with confidence.

3. Wear a bikini when I'll be in the Philippine beaches.

4. Indulge more often in luxury

5. To marry a stranger and be a wife and a mother.

6. Learn to say "NO" to my family.

7. Go back in School and be a Management Accountant

There are things I used to do here like wearing a bikini but I don't know if I can do it when I'll be home. The environment, the culture and the people are different. There are restriction and limitation especially I'll be surrounded with conservative family. Hehehe!I will see!

Underneath a libel washes the motorway.

on believing myself

I  think that is so crazy insane how we can get caught out in  life that we forget the foundation of the things that make us who we are. I'm not a writer nor born to be a writer I just love to take notes whatever I think and feel. Back few years ago,   I used to write down all of the things that I know to be true for myself and for life in general... When I sorting out my things today, I stumbled across my notes and saw the list.

This is the notes that I found  today!

1. I've come to realize I try to hard to hold on the things I should let go.
2. I've found a million things in myself that I never thought Its possible to happen.
3. I realize that no mater how much you love someone that doesn't mean they will ever love you back .
4. I can see now that there are no rewards without risk.
5. I know that things have to hurt bad before they ever get better.
6. I've come to realize that no matter how hard I try nothing i ever 100 percent cetain.
7. I've come to realize that friends only come and goes and its how you make the time that matters.
8. I can see that a family , is a family after all what you have done to them.
9. I can see that I have given an opportunity in this life and I shouldn't  take it for granted.
10. I've come to realize that pain is the foundation of beautiful things that has yet to come.
11. I believe that everybody has given an opportunity to forget and forgive and correct their mistakes and move on in life.
12. I know that love is the greatest thing in the world and hearbreak is worst to bare.
13. I believe when GOD closes the door he may not open another right away but he always leave a window for us  to crawl out.
14. I've realize that to grow is a learning process.
15. I've come to the conclusion that life is truly about the journey not the destination.
16. I believe that determination is the key for everything.
17. Life is often a risk, take changes, and if you are not happy , fix it until who you've  become and who you are.

After reading this list, I don't know if I lost the part of me who had self confidence and faith in myself.  Definitely that girl is not lost but I want to find her again not of who she was but to be better and be better and better!

Notes from my diary ..January 23, 2003

I just wonder why it happen to me? Is this my fate? Lord, please guide me the right way!

* There are those who were mislead into believing that a relationship was right and there are those who were knew that was a sin right from the beginning but may of us even after knowing were going the wrong way still. They choose to take the chance and persitently stay on that road, even if we know of the danger that lurks in its path. 

GOD, always put a"red stop light" along our journey to remind us that we are going to hurt ourselves if we use stubbornly stop on the gas and move on. But he doesn't put a physical barrier to keep us in place. In the end, it is still our choice base on our own free will to stop what is wrong and move on with what is right . 

* You choose not to become part of it not because it was your heart wanted you to do but because it was what your conscience was telling you, girl. I'm glad you looked at GOD stop light and step on the brakes. *